You know some shit happens for a reason you can't understand why. Some good....some bad but that doesn't mean you give up. That is only pushing you to become better. All are decisions in life do affect are tomorrows if they come. They sure do affect are futures if we even see it down the line.
So yes it was dam reckless and stupid to have another child at this time but what if I didn't have none of them. What if I choice to let them all go and done the opposite of what people wanted me to do? I could have but I didn't. I had to make a choice for my mistakes. I had to chose life or no life. That's a hard decision to make at any age.
Yes, sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I didn't have them but who to say what I'm thinking is right. I might be caught up in this world still not knowing who I am and doing what others do. Reckless and careless still as I am a little still now but not by far I was when I was younger.
In some way I believe my children saved me from something I will never know about. They made me become responsible and love for once.
I can see clearer then I have ever before. Instead of searching for that perfect guy that is sure not out there I'm trying to make sure my life is the way it should be for Yah (God in Hebrew). My path is not my path but his path. What evil attended to be for bad, Yah made it good.
Remember every step you take it might be your last. Make sure you take the right steps with no regrets. Follow the most high for once and see where he takes you. If you are in a bind, listen to your gut because it's him talking to you. ( That's how I feel)
If you don't listen then be ready for what is ahead. Don't give up but keep on moving. Get up and keep on moving!!!
I got up and I kept on moving. If I didn't then I wouldn't be here writing to you now. I would be waiting for my judgment as I knew it was the wrong decision but it's to late to over turn it because I would be there not on earth.
everything counts.
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