Soul Searching

 I fond myself soul searching as I went on a mad crazy mood where I just want to get things done with homeschool. Well I had to stop myself as everything was falling apart. Like literally falling apart. My wall hanger for my purses and coats or whatever fail. All I was like "Shit, something else to deal with. 

   I could have went off and stayed mad but instead I took a shower. I need to cool off. I was overwhelmed with life struggles that I couldn't take it. So finally this was my only me time. I sat in the shower as I let my hair get wet, I cried. I talked to Yah and cried. That felt so good that I decided to fix my little problem in my room with getting something to have the towels or purses on something different. When I think about it, I could got another rack but I didn't want to put holes in the wall again. I already have tones of those which I'm not trying to add to. 

  Finally leaving the house since...okay I left Sunday to get pizza and my mom something from the store. That was it but nothing for myself or what I needed. It was nice getting out the house and breath. I'm glad we are not on quarantine yet. ( I know It's coming) 

I have not at since 6m this morning I new I was getting hungry and I didn't want anything in the house. I already ate oatmeal and I was already snappy. ( Note to self, get more breakfast food you will eat)

  I went to the store with my daughter to get Chorizo. of course to target to only buy more things then I came in for. I got sanitize wipes that finally came in. I was super excited as I can just whip down the counter without having to use a paper towel or tissue. I know I need to invest in a sponge or something. 

  As I walk through I was thinking "I need buckets but I can not get those now. I would have to pay back my credit card more then I would like.(" You know interest on shit.") Over all I got a puzzled for the family to do together( I probably will do it) sanitize wipes, and hooks I need for the wall. So I did pretty well but at the same time....Maybe I should get a Target Red card Debit? 

  I'm tight on money but I have a eye doctor appointment tomorrow and I'm hoping to get my unemployment to pay for my contacts, not my exam. I might just call and order them when I'm ready. credit card it due and another bill I owe. You see I really wanted a Kitchen Aid. I have been waiting forever and finally I got it but I have like 1 or 2 more payments and I'm done paying it and something else. 

  As I budget I will be okay. I'm so happy I have food stamps. Without those I have no idea how I'm going to feed my kids. Okay well hoping we don't catch covi-19 as if the government didn't help, well I guess I would get the food some how even if i have to go to the foodbank. 

This is the end of my blog. I hope you enjoy and keep following my journey on here and subscribe to my YouTube channel. 

My Journey My Life